Poetry and creative writing to ease heartache
In my struggle to find some kind of mental balance over the years as a full time carer to my sweet Wife Beryl, I found that to pour out my daily stress into a kind of diary that could then be hidden from my sight inside the Computer archives. This idea seemed to work in the way we have been told by the clergy that prayer is a `healer`; Praying is just another way of searching for hope and to relieve inner stress too, Right ?
I found that this diversion from the real world helped me cope, though it never could replace the feeling of powerlessness in my fight to help Beryl to recover after her devastating brain embolism in 1995 .
No one in any authority, be it Medical or Admin, seemed to be far away from any ability to help or understand the situation in terms of humanity, but then of course most have only aquired their academic status by reading books.
In this section of this `Venerable, NOT Vulnerable` pages I hope to encourage those in need of possitive help to add their stories and poetry regarding their own individual experiences.
Even the fear of computer technology was overcome after I had witnessed some very dumb younger people who had got through the basics and beyond. I took up the challenge and soon discoverd that my age wasn't the `barrier` that others try to depict.
In my struggle to find some kind of mental balance over the years as a full time carer to my sweet Wife Beryl, I found that to pour out my daily stress into a kind of diary that could then be hidden from my sight inside the Computer archives. This idea seemed to work in the way we have been told by the clergy that prayer is a `healer`; Praying is just another way of searching for hope and to relieve inner stress too, Right ?
I found that this diversion from the real world helped me cope, though it never could replace the feeling of powerlessness in my fight to help Beryl to recover after her devastating brain embolism in 1995 .
No one in any authority, be it Medical or Admin, seemed to be far away from any ability to help or understand the situation in terms of humanity, but then of course most have only aquired their academic status by reading books.
In this section of this `Venerable, NOT Vulnerable` pages I hope to encourage those in need of possitive help to add their stories and poetry regarding their own individual experiences.
Even the fear of computer technology was overcome after I had witnessed some very dumb younger people who had got through the basics and beyond. I took up the challenge and soon discoverd that my age wasn't the `barrier` that others try to depict.
Written after I was forced to let the local authorities take Beryl into so called care ! after 13 years of caring for her at home. I spent the following sad years visiting her to care for her two or three times per day, every day, because she wasn't getting cared for by the `Institution `!!!
Side By Side
The day we met; our fate was sealed my sweet
Before that day we were just two strangers on a street
I really believe if our eyes hadn’t met on that day
We would have walked on bye with nothing to say
But side by side we have remained as one
Over all these years pain had come and gone
But side by side we grew strong and devout
Our personal bonds grew stronger without any doubt
Physical life has a limited time allotted on this earth; we all know
But our love isn’t caged in a body alone as death will show
Side by side age and illness has destroyed our dreams
No fault of our own it clearly seems.
Nineteen years of watching your illness tear our bodies apart
I took solace knowing your memory deserted you from the start
Dementia has forced dissection leaving me physically all alone
Though can never break our mutual love; that is set in stone
I visit you now with a heavy heart filled with tears and woe
As we sit side by side I hold your spoon to show where your food must go
Longing to hear your words that have been stolen from you
Just three would be a blessing “ I love you” as you daily used to do
Then side by side our eyes meet as your Angelic smile shines through
My inner soul hears clearly “ I sincerely do love you”
I repeat many times those words for you to hear
As our eyes are locked in silence we have no fear.
side by side hands entwined both hearts beating as one some how
Lips meet like in a warm glow; who needs words now ?
Memories return of that first ever kiss that sealed our fate
Enabling me to carry my load as daily it gains in weight.
The long drive home passes like a blur; a flash of light
My eyes filled with tears expecting yet another lonely night
As I prepare for another visit ; my emotions I have to hide
But rest assured my sweetheart we will remain side by side